Thursday, May 25, 2006

We carried our 15-foot burlap likeness of Winkie down to the courthouse before 5 a.m.—hours before the charges against the defendant were to be read out—but hundreds of protestors were already there chanting, “Smite the Satan Bear!” As we began tilting the likeness upright, the crowd fell eerily silent, and for that moment we were proud of our lovingly sewn soft sculpture (even though it was quite a bit smaller than originally planned). But then someone in the crowd shrieked a command, and like a school of piranha they swarmed over the cloth bear, trampling it and tearing it to shreds—using broken bottles, plastic forks, knitting needles, nail clippers, even their dentures (removed from the mouth and operated like scissors).

The police stood by unconcerned. Fortunately for us, the crowd’s fury at Winkie was such that they scarcely noticed his human supporters, and we escaped to the sidelines unharmed. We watched as they trampled the remnants some more and sang, “Kill! Kill! Kill!” to the tune of “Amazing Grace.”

We’re disheartened. Besides indicating Winkie’s continued poor standing in the public mind, this also means we will all have to take an incomplete in Fabric Crafts Intensive.

8 Comments:

Anonymous Rumsfeld House said...

thanks for providing the effigy for yesterday's protest, losers.

May 26, 2006  
Blogger Free Winkie Committee said...

we freely admit that our decision not to carry traditional protest signs led to the crowd's perception that our sculpture was intended as an effigy.

May 26, 2006  
Anonymous Laszlo Hirsuity said...

i fear that a more open protest might lead to violence against the free winkie committee. even though i have been accused of being an fbi infiltrator of the committee, i do care about a certain member of the committee very much and don't want her harmed!

May 26, 2006  
Anonymous Laszlo Hirsuity said...

p.s. bao, why won't you talk to me?

May 26, 2006  
Anonymous THE REAL laszlo hirsuity said...

To the person who is calling himself Laszlo Hirsuity: You can't be him, because I'm him. Which means that you are an imposter of an FBI infiltrator, the lowest of the low. Free Winkie Committee beware! The real Laszlo is here to warn you---hide your furry friends in pillowcases, in ice boxes, in the glove compartment in your car. Winkie's enemies are everywhere!!!!

May 31, 2006  
Anonymous Anonymous said...

If you people had attended bible class when you were youngsters you would know that we are OBLIGATED to smite Winkie and all his spawn. It's right there in Leviticus. Read your scripture, you heathens. Failing fabric class will be the least of your worries where you're headed.

May 31, 2006  
Blogger Free Winkie Committee said...

after sewing for 48 straight in order to receive a grade of C, we've decided that fabric class IS hell.

June 02, 2006  
Blogger renuka said...

Nice Informative article. Indian silver jewelry is as traditional as the gold jewelry. I would like to share the site www.kaneesha.com they have an exclusive range of silver jewelry. I purchased one from this site and it's simply stunning piece.

August 18, 2010  

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